~ Chapter 44 ~
Monday, September 13, 1999
Kevin stared at Loreto's sleeping figure. He turned away from her and rolled over, gazing out the window. The sun was just rising over the horizon, casting a bright red halo above the trees. Another beautiful late Summer day in Florida. 'I wish I felt as good as the weather looks,' he thought to himself.
It had been four days since the disaster at Nick's house. For those four days, Kevin spent his time in alternating stages of mourning, crying, and sleeping. 'And hating myself. Can't forget that one.' Now it was Monday. He was going to have to face Nick again. The thought scared him. If someone would've told him two years ago that he would be afraid of Nick, he would've peed in his pants at the thought. But now it was a reality.
He crawled out of bed slowly and took a deep breath. He really wanted to crawl back under the covers where it was safe and warm. But he knew he couldn't. He had responsibilies and he didn't need management pissed at him.
He stood in the shower for 20 minutes, thinking. He finally came to a decision. There really was only one thing he could do. He didn't want to, but he saw no other alternative.
He threw his sweatpants on and jogged downstairs. He stared at the crumpled piece of paper in his hand for a moment before picking up the phone and dialing that all-too-familiar number.
First day of rehearsals for NA tour...
"What's her name, Howie? Come on man, spill the beans!"
Howie grinned shyly. Brian and AJ had just found out about the new woman in his life. He didn't want to say too much, but he couldn't contain his excitement. "Her name's Claudia. I've known her for a while. You guys remember her? She's from Canada."
AJ nodded. "That stunning Canadian chick who models?"
"She's not a chick AJ, she's a woman. All woman!" He added for
measure.
AJ's eyes widened while Brian laughed. "You sly dog you!" Brian said, grinning, then got serious. "The best of luck to you. I, for one, can tell ya that it ain't easy to make a relationship work with the lifestyle we lead."
"I know, Rok. That's why we're taking it slow. Right now it's more of a friendship."
"But you sleep together, right?" AJ asked nosily.
"Well...yea!" Howie laughed. "Gotta have some nookie. I'm not made of steel, man!"
AJ noticed Kevin standing in the doorway. "Hey Kev! Why you lurkin' in the doorway?"
"I...uh...didn't want to disturb you guys. Howie, congrats on..well, not congrats, just glad to know you met someone." He looked around. "Is..uh...is Nick here yet?"
Brian noticed his cousin's nervous pitch. "Kev, you ok man? You look nervous. And no, Nick's not here. As a matter of fact, I've been trying to reach him for a week and I haven't been able to."
"I tried this weekend and I couldn't reach him," Howie said. "I've left several messages, too. He hasn't called me back."
Brian grabbed his backpack and picked up his cell. "Leigh and I went to the Keys for three days so I haven't checked to see if he called." He checked his messages. "Yea I have three messages --- one from Nick." He listened intently and his expression changed to one of worry and anger. He closed the cell and threw it onto his backpack. "Alright, Nick called a couple of days ago."
"Good," AJ said. He saw Brian's face. "Umm...not good?"
"He called from out of town."
"What?" Howie chirped.
"Maybe cousin Kevin here can enlighten us." He turned to Kevin, who seemed to shrink under Brian's glare. "What exactly did Nick mean, Kev, by "Frick, Shae and I have left town. I don't know when we'll be back. I'm sorry for not calling. I can't talk about it right now, but if you want an explanation, I suggest you talk to Kevin."
Kevin let out an incoherent sound. "Brian..."
"What did you do to Nick?" Howie asked, his own anger getting the better of him. "I thought we were past this. What the hell happened now?"
"I went to talk to him last Thursday. I needed to come clean about everything that happened last year."
"The stuff you couldn't tell me?" Brian demanded.
"Yea. So I told him. All of it. And now he hates me."
"He HATES you?" AJ repeated in surprise. "Maybe you should tell US what you told Nick."
Kevin looked miserable. "And have you hate me, too?" he whispered.
"Kevin, stop f**king with us," AJ retorted in anger. "Just tell us what you did to Nick. We'll be the judges of whether or not we'll hate you."
"Hate's a strong word," Howie interjected.
"OK!" Kevin paced the room in fustration. "I was the "other man" that Nick's ex was seeing in 1998. I took her home on New Years Eve and slept with her. That's where it began." He stopped as the three pairs of eyes stared at him in acute disbelief.
"Tell me you're kidding?" Brian couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"I wish I was kidding! I...I don't have any excuse. I was stupid, I was an idiot, I betrayed one of my friends. I know all that. Nick spelt out his feelings for me quite clearly."
"Do you blame him?" AJ asked.
"No, I guess I don't. But we all make mistakes."
"That's one hell of a mistake to make, Kev," Howie said. "Don't we have a golden rule that we set six years ago? That if one of us is serious about a girl, the others back off? That we never sleep with each other's dates or girlfriends? Didn't we swear on all of this and seal it with a handshake?"
There's nothing worse than stealing your friend's woman," AJ added. "That just ain't right, bro."
"I KNOW THAT!" Kevin screamed. "Just lemme explain something to you."
He felt like a broken record as he told the story for the fifth time in less than a month. When he got to the part about the accident, he paused.
"There's more, isn't there?" Brian asked the obvious.
Kevin nodded sadly. "Yea. I'm the one who's responsible for Nick's car accident."
"WHAT????!!!!!!" all three yelled in unison.
"H...how??" Howie stammered.
Again, he told the story of the day of the accident. "I have to live with this forever," he ended. "So don't sit there and condemn me with your eyes. I know what I did and I'm paying for it."
"So is Nick, you asshole!" Brian raged. "How could you be so careless?"
"I'm sorry," Kevin sobbed. "I'm sorry."
"Alright, guys, we need to calm down," Howie said. "Nick is gone. What do we tell Fatima? Management? We have a tour starting in two weeks and no Nick."
"We tell them the truth," Brian said. "No more lies! No more secrets. I'm SICK of this. Lies and secrets tear people apart, as you can tell from the hole Kevin's dug himself."
Kevin sighed. "I'll go call them."
Once he left the room, Brian just looked at AJ and Howie. "Is this nightmare that began last April ever gonna end?"
The others guys just shook their heads sadly. No one had an answer.
Kevin stopped his truck and watched as a good-looking man in his late 20's opened the door on the passenger side and got in. "Long time no see, Richardson."
"I've been in Europe."
"Did you get some good shit while you were there?"
"Not as good as yours."
"You got the cash?"
Kevin reached over in the backseat and gave the man a brown paper bag. "A thousand dollars. It's all there."
The man peered inside and nodded. "I trust you. Here's the stuff. A brand-new shipment. Pure shit."
Kevin looked inside the bag and inhaled. "This is just what I need. Thanks man."
The man nodded and climbed out. "Call me when you need more."
Kevin nodded and stuck the bag under his seat. He needed to get home and fast. He hoped Loreto was already gone to work. She couldn't find out about this. He laughed. Clean for a few weeks. It was good while it lasted. 'It's Nick's fault," he said to himself. 'If he would just forgive me, I wouldn't have to resort to desperate measures to keep my sanity.'
|
